Keeping still, delighted with a lap cat, I struggle as my mind runs marathons. At what point will time slow down? Why does my body feel stuck in place?

It’s easy to pull oneself apart, dismantle habits and hobbies that don’t fit around chores and checklists. But isn’t that the marriage of a house and home – that balance of practical and persona. In the ever draining task of living one day after the next, there is the chorus to “take care” of yourself, to carve out time for a bath or another newly commodified or gamified ritual.

The personal time and self-care routine is no longer ours, there is another person in the room who directs your self-care. Begging the question, are you even still in control of your own downtime? Or have we traded our intuitive understanding for a “guaranteed” and popular reassurance. They remind us to stay hooked on habits and hobbies, provide a prescribed downtime when we aren’t running the societal chores and checklists.

So, with a cat happily snoring on my lap, I finally catch up with that nagging, pulling feeling inside. Maybe my problems can’t be solved by a new distraction via game or book; soap operas or Reddit posts. The urge for less has become a noise filter instead.

Silence and stillness have become easier to notice recently. The subtle shifts of energy within a day can finally be track. It’s surprising how often I simply happen to land in quiet. This peace is hard won and hand crafted. When there is such tension and economic threats, it seems selfish. But if I don’t learn to craft this inner-peace for myself, then who will?

Peace is more than a pretty stone or chasing a high. It is our natural softness revealed. When I write, there is rarely peace. It is embers on a page from a fire that is spitting out from a rampaging mind.

No, my peace comes from my cat’s need for snuggles. It comes from trust and shared vulnerability. There is peace in green and nature because it is miraculous and could absolutely return us back into the natural cycle – of water, energy and carbon. We trust that which renders us helpless in a curious form of radical acceptance.

Acceptance turns to peace as a form of joy. Joy as an oasis from grief and desolation. When we cultivate this inner peace, without another’s dictation, we can build bridges stronger than ever. We find connection over conflict, learn that peacefulness is not owned by a corporation nor divinity, but instead is the result of cumulative introspection and self accountability.